I recently saw a copy of People magazine.
On the cover was “Guts & Glory” and a FULL PAGE photo of Simone Biles, in a much smaller side photo was the gymnast who won multiple medals and a caption “Plus Suni Lee’s Inspiring Win”
One of our Sons (A former university athlete) commented “They should have given Suni her Moment, thats HER moment”
I opened the magazine to see 3 pages of center story about Miss Biles and a half page about the whole US Olympic team and a quote by Suni on Biles.
What message is this sending? That excellence, fortitude and actually WINNING is but a mere footnote in contrast to the story of pain, abuse and mental illness.
That showing up and doing the thing is less important than your STORY of pain.
And this is what bears talking about.
Because it’s not really about Ms. Biles at all.
It’s about the collective egregore of people – more specifically women- using their pain as their platform.
It is the expression of a virus in the collective right now where all a woman needs to do is cry into a camera and say “As a WOMAN…” or “As a (insert identifier here) WOMAN” and everyone will perceive her as being victimized and needing rescuing.
Oddly this is seen as power.
And it is a *form* of power- because Feminine power is ultimately the power of INFLUENCE not IMPACT.
We influence the collective with our behavior, our emotions, and our connectivity.
Feminine power has ALWAYS been unseen but KNOWN. The lie and illusion is that because it is UNSEEN – it is not there.
It is ALWAYS there. And as amazing extraordinary powerful women it is our responsibility to wield our power with Grace and with Honor.
Not to use our pain as a crutch or as a leverage point.
Miss Biles could have bowed out of that cover. She could have said- this isn’t about me and now is NOT my moment it’s actually THEIRS. She could have stood for her team the same way they even while winning stood for her.
And I see this over and over again- women – when offered the opportunity to leverage pain, to use it, to profit from it saying YES.
Let’s be clear there will be no penalty for doing this. The collective will love you. They will tell you how brave and amazing you are. Other women will link arms with you and call you “sister”.
But you’ll know.
You’ll know inside that instead of standing in your brilliant sovereign you took that moment and used it.
You’ll know where you refused to hold the line.
You’ll known where you stopped standing in Truth and instead allowed yourself to be swayed by the collective victim party line.
You’ll know within that someone asked you play small, they asked if they could diminish you, if their perception of you could hold even a small amount of power over you- and you gave it to them.
You said yes.
Years ago someone heard about some experiences I had. The experience of rape, the experience of molestation, the experience of homelessness- and they wanted to showcase those experiences on their platform. The idea was how inspiring it would be, yet the conversation was to expand the impact of these events on me.
And I said no.
No, if you think the most inspiring thing about me is where I came from.
No, if you want to connect with me because of ONE experience.
NO, if you require my story to be one of pain and oppression.
Absolutely no, if you require that trauma and pain bond to “relate” to me.
So it’s your turn amazing brilliant woman…
Are you willing to be one of the Extraordinary Women who usher in a completely new paradigm of womanhood?
Where our stories are of what works, our successes, of monumental love?
Where we speak with respect and awe about men, with inspiration and lavish appreciation about each other, and where we CELEBRATE OPENLY life?
And yes we acknowledge when we are hurting… but we ALLOW it to be a moment – not a mountain. Not a hashtag. Not a movement.
Are you ready to withdraw ALL of your power from the Victim Narrative of womanhood, from false empowerment thats really just FORCE, from the lack of integrity masquerading as intuition and from fear acting as insight?
As you ready to be TRULY Sovereign?
Then it’s time to Rise- Find your Keys to your InfiniteLife™ here: InfiniteLife: Keys for Feminine Extraordinary Women